Daniel's Djinn Tales

0:00 Daniel's Dread Tales is a show for grown-ups. It may contain adult language and adult themes. Please check the episode description for content warnings. Yeah. OK, shall we do an intro? Shall we introduce ourselves? I guess we should do some of those things, yeah. Yeah, Hello, everyone. Welcome to our Halloween special here at Daniel's Dread Tales. I am Nathan pronouns he, him, you know me from these parts. Today I am joined by. I we're, we're all being very polite and waiting.

0:44 Go ahead person who's name I don't want to say 'cause you should introduce yourself. Hi, I'm Damien Evay after you all. Right. I'm Daniel Heeham of Daniel of the Dread Tales. And I'm Russell lay them also of Daniel's gin tales. Oh, Daniel's Gin Tales, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, OK. All right. Yes. And as we have just implied this year's Halloween special, we are talking about a movie, Wishmaster, a 1997 horror film. And I had a pretty good time with it. I did too.

1:29 Directed by Robert Kurtzman, who you may know from, well, directing Wish Master. No, you know him from mostly doing special effects on a lot of other movies. He's not really known as a director so much, but he kind of knocked it out of the park with this one. Yeah, Yeah, he did. Not the scariest movie I've ever seen, but it has its merits. Oh yeah. I wouldn't necessarily call it scary, but it's a, it's a, it's a hoot. I would call it a hoot. That is how I would describe it starring.

2:13 Oh yeah, go ahead. It it's definitely an experience. Yeah. Yes. It stars the excellent Andrew DeVos and as the evil genie who is the wishmaster. And then there's a bunch of other people running around. But he truly is the best part of the Flick A. 100 percent, 100%. So who had seen this movie before? Before we sat down for this several times. Yeah, you were the one who recommended it so. I had, but it had been a while. I thought I had seen it, and then I sat down to watch it and clearly had not seen it.

2:58 So I don't know where I got the idea that I'd see it, but I did not remember anything about it. I had seen the kill count, but no, I had not seen the movie itself in full. OK, well now we all have. Now we all have. Be careful what you wish for. Or be careful what you did in general. Sort of declare in a offhanded manner. Yeah, yeah. He. Motherfucker plays real loose with what qualifies as a wish. Big time.

3:39 Yeah, just saying you want something is you're going to get wished baby. I mean, even a yeah, sure, on occasion. Yeah, but then he has to say as you wish. As you wish. Yeah, I I didn't have enough syllables. You're right. I needed to add more syllables to it. He cannot say wish or wishes without the extra syllable. Yeah. Gin impression is startlingly good. This is one of the reasons I love the movie. It's just such a fun voice to do. Yeah. All right, so we should probably talk about the plot of this thing.

4:23 But overall, there's an evil genie. He wants you to make wishes, and if you make wishes, bad things happen. We start out with an extremely long opening scene that is barely relevant for the rest of the movie, followed by exposition monologue because we needed that as well. Yeah, I don't, don't. Yeah, I it is what happened to the art of the opening text narration, you know, And the answer is it died. And I'm kind of glad, but. Yeah, this is the first of our horror movie. Like All Star cameos actually in the opening text, because they don't trust you to read, so they read it out loud too. They don't know if everybody watching the movie is illiterate.

5:16 It was the 90s, yeah. Yeah, but that's Angus Scrim, the tall man from Phantasm doing the opening narration. Yeah, that's a pretty deep cut. I've yeah, I do love that. It's very weird. I mean, you know, I the whole movie is it's like produced by. No, maybe it's not. I thought, yeah, never mind. Definitely. No, it's Wes Craven. Yeah, it says Wes Craven presents at the top of the the poster. Wes Craven's like, you know, he's a big horror guy, so we got all of his horror buddies to come in.

6:00 I guess. That's the that's the next movie we should watch. We should watch Phantasm. That. That's a wild fucking movie if you haven't seen it. I'm not sure if I have or not. Yeah, you would be more excited about me saying, hey, the Taliban from Witch from Phantasm, not from Witchmaster. The Taliban from Witchmaster is is the gin I guess. Now we got away for everyone. Now when we watch Phantasm it's going to be like, oh shit, it's the opening narrator from Witchmaster. Exactly, he says. Fear the gin so coolly. Only fear the Jin, which is good because now I don't have to worry about anything else.

6:41 Yeah, I will say I I do enjoy this movie. It has a lot of really stupid lines. Oh yeah, I also don't know if I buy into the the premise. Like it seems so odd. God made okay, God made light and that made angels. Okay, maybe God made earth and that gave birth to man. All right, I'm with you. Okay, and then the fire gave birth to gin. Where the fuck did the fire come from? Yeah, I don't know. I. Think that wasn't mentioned? And if God made that, then why did he banish all of them to a hell dimension?

7:24 It's like one of those things were like, he's like, I'm going to make fire. That's going to be cool. I hope the fire doesn't create anything terrible. And then the fire created something terrible and he just has to go like, oh, you tried, son. Well, turns out Earth created man, so that also made something terrible. But that's that's all other conversation. Yeah, you know, and they're sealed away. But if you wish enough times, they get out and they'll kill everybody on Earth. You just have to accept it. You just have to accept it anyway. Also, by the way, I was talking about this with people before we even started this. The this magic gem that the wizard is going to seal the gin away with. We see them making it.

8:10 That's not how gems is made. They're pouring it like molten metal like they're making a sword, but they put it into like a a gem mold. That's not how it I. Don't know. No, it's a geode. Yeah, yeah. And. It's even less how geodes are made. That's so, that's so much. And like I said this one I'm willing to give it a slide because like the guy doing it is explicitly a wizard. You're right, it is magic. Anyway, so after our after our opening duration, we're in Persia in old timey times. Yeah, and.

8:51 And how's it going in Persia? Could be better. Smash cut to smash cut to this absolute madness that I really feel like the Persian emperor should have seen this one coming, he said. I wish to see wonders. Yeah, that's that. That has a monkey popble wish if I ever heard one. It's the most monkey popble wish. You basically let the the gin cast domain expansion on the entire area around you. Like that guy has free range do whatever the fuck he wants now. But it's great. It gives us an excuse to see a bunch of like quick shots of wild special effects and crazy stuff going on. Like the just like an alien come out of a guy's stomach. There's a lady turning into wood. There's the skeleton that pops out of the guy's body. That's a.

9:47 And then starts attacking another guy. Exactly, it rules. And also for some reason Han Solo. I guess they just had the prop lying around and had to use it. Yeah, the one of them kind of looks like Han Solo. You are correct. You know, sometimes it's it's sad that all person turning into wall effects will forever carry the connotation of being Han Solo, but I think it's a burden we must all bear for the good of the human. Rights, yeah, but it's pretty. It's some really gnarly special effects, which is usually.

10:31 God I I'm sorry, I'm pausing because I'm playing this quietly in the background and I'm seeing the skeleton come out of the guy's head. Oh shit, this rules. I should pause it so I'm not distracted by it. God, you. You sure you don't want to be the one to run this Dan? You seem to be having a great time. No, no, no. It's, it's fine. It's fine, yeah. And that's, look, this movie definitely slows down after this opening special effects nonsense. Yeah, like the wizard prevents the king from making his third wish, which would unleash all the jinn upon earth and seals the jinn inside. I think they called it a fire Opal. Correct.

11:16 Yeah. And as we find out later, there's kind of a loophole to that one, too. Yeah, yeah. Also I don't understand why, I mean again you just have to go with it, but why is it if you make 3 wishes the JID will come into the world like it's Mortal Kombat and like they've won the tournament they get to kill everybody on earth like it? Because. Because that's the rules. I know, I know. It's just the rules. It's. Wizard shit. It's the rules. Why do the Cenobites come out when you open the box? Yeah, well, it's the rules. There is a lot of buy in in this movie. I find there is just a fair amount of stuff where you have to go.

11:59 Like to watch this movie you must accept many steps of this premise. Yeah. I mean, I'm not trying to cinema sense this thing. It's just there's a lot. It's there's a lot going on and in some, in some ways there's a lot going on. In some ways it's just really fucking stupid and I'm overthinking it. Exactly. I noticed a mention of legally distinct nib Chagarath no relation. I believe they. I believe this wizard we find out later is I think it's Zoraster, like the founder of Zorastrianism. Which is, I've got the Wikipedia page pulled up to a double check and yeah, it's it's a roster. That's the guy.

12:51 It's a little weird to have like the leader of a religious that's like, it's not quite like having Jesus show up and banish the jinn, but like, it's adjacent anyway. It's not some real ass religion. Yeah, I mean, all religious are saying, but you know, it's weird. OK. Are we allowed to air that? Yeah, we've firmly established that Daniel is moving towards annoying atheists. So like. That is true. That is true. OK. It's honestly only the 7th most blasphemous thing said in earnest on this podcast. So. Yeah, exactly.

13:33 Anyway, so then, so they sealed away the jet and we're good, right? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, definitely. Smash cut modern day America and modern day 19. Seven day America. It's not even 1997, it's present day America, which means it is 2025. OK, explains all the fucking flip phones, which is something we have in 2025 America. None of these longshoremen is wearing high viz vest. There's no designated smoking area. There's no spotter. I don't know how these docks work. Well, they don't work well because one of the first things we see on this dock is a drunk guy like has something like get destroyed.

14:18 He does. Kill a man? Yeah. A little bit. Oh yeah, I guess he killed the guy too. I may be forgetting. So a art dealer, Raymond Beaumont, played by fucking Freddy Krueger himself, Robert Englund, is getting this statue brought in, and the drunk crane operator drops the statue on Freddy Krueger's assistant, killing him, breaking the statue and revealing the gem hidden inside, which is subtly snatched by a dock worker. A guy who never appears to be a dock. Everybody's just stealing stuff. Shit ass doc who hired these people. I will note this is less of a cool. This is a less iconic cameo, but the drunk guy is Joseph Polito, who plays the bad guy general in Day of the Dead. The guy who starts screaming I had it with your monkey shines that that guy.

15:22 If you've seen that movie, you know who I'm talking about. Yeah, to choke on them, guy. I think so, yeah. Yeah. Choke on them. Oh God, what that dude? Oh yeah, he does that too. I just think of the stuff where he starts yelling at the the other scientists. But yeah, yeah, everybody is here, is what I'm saying. Also, just in the background is Ted Raimi, Sam Raimi's brother. He doesn't really do much, but he's. Well, he's the one who dies. Oh yeah, he's right. He's the one who dies. Yeah, he's the one who gets taken out. Holy shit. What a cameo that was a real, real sort scream time for that guy, Yeah.

16:05 Yeah, everyone's here. So the guy takes the gem away and then what? I don't remember what happens next. Let's see. 11 minutes in, we meet our heroine getting hit on by her best friend. Yeah, our heroine is a gemologist who is called in by her boss to examine this thing when a pawnbroker brings it to them. Her best friend sucks. Yeah, yeah. Her best friend is is is in, he is on screen for like 5 minutes and I think he hit on her at least 15 times. Like average 3A minute.

16:58 It was impressively shitty. Right, So like she's so we see her and she's going to like examine the gem and then she's like, oh, there's something weird in this gem of and then she's saying, yeah, with her shitty not boyfriend who wants to be her boyfriend? And then they just like play tennis for a while. Bowling tennis comes first. Yeah. The tennis comes first. Yeah, she is called from the tennis game to examine this gem. That's what it is. OK, OK. Yeah. And then in the process of doing that, she kind of blows on it and rubs it against her blouse, which cue the whole you rubbed the thing.

17:46 The genie is then wait, which kind of started the the the wake up sequence. Yeah. Subtitles say that, Jin said. You have awoken me. I didn't actually hear that. I don't. Think he did. He did. It was just kind of quiet and they they, they tried to make it subtle. Clearly they succeeded if I missed it. Like she is is it that she has to leave? She has to leave so that the gem could blow up and kill shitty guy, but she's not going to be there. She takes. It to shitty guy's lab at a university and it's like, hey, this is weird. Can you examine this?

18:30 And he's like, yeah. And then he hits on her again a bunch. Well, she is clearly anti interested. Yeah. And then she leaves and he's examining it later and it fucking explodes in the machine that he was using to examine it for some reason. For Genie related reasons. Yeah, Genie related reasons, naturally. Yeah, yeah. It's usually gin, yeah. Not that genie, but yeah. Oh, and he starts out as a little brain baby looking dude. Yeah. By choice. Yeah, that was a a thing during that era of horror content. Yeah, I mean, what's the point of a good horror practical effect if you're not going to make at least one ungodly flesh monster, right?

19:27 Oh, exactly. It's such a good horror concept. John Carpenter made a whole film about it. Exactly. Shouldn't forget though, the reason that she's not in the lab is she has to go coach her basketball team. That's right, she runs a girls basketball team. She runs a girls basketball team in a subplot that feels like you're like, oh, is this going to be something? And it's kind of something, but it's not really something. Yeah. I But anyway, enough about the girls basketball team. There's this horrible wet, greasy puppet man off the ground. Yeah, who then begins to.

20:08 Start of some fairly fast and loose definitions on what qualifies as a wish, as Alex wishes for or not Alex. Josh. Josh Yeah, wishes for relief from his pain. Yeah, and then kills him. Yeah, yeah. I mean, he was relieved of his pain. Yeah, yeah. To be fair, in the Jin's position, that is what I would have done too, yeah. And then it helps the gin reconstitute into a humanoid. Yes. Sort of. I mean, just so that it's just, I mean, admittedly he was a guy in a costume though, like a wild fucking prosthetic costume. Now he's in a less wild, but still definitely a guy in the costume who's standing up.

20:59 I believe that is. I read somewhere that that's Verne Schroyer as the small version of the JID, but I can't find that anywhere, so that might not be true. OK. I have a note here that with Nick did Nick, Josh. I have no idea how he got his name so wrong. Rather consistently while taking notes. Now she can get better friends. Yeah. Yeah, one would hope. You know, it's good that he's dead because like, it would suck if he like came back or something. Yeah, that would be stupid. That'd be so dumb. OK I'm IMDb does say that is Verne Troyer so that is mini me as the monster but this this is pre Austin Powers though so.

21:46 Yeah. Anyway, yeah 'cause the the gin feeds on wishes, which I don't know, again, that's just that's what it does. It feeds on wishes, but to be free it has to get 3 wishes from the one who rubbed the OR the the gem. Is that right? Is that how it works 'cause he gets more than 3 wishes from like a lot of people 'cause he keeps doing like wish shit to people, but he has to get 3 from her. We don't know this yet. This hasn't really been established yet, but he's going to try to get 3 from her and then that's going to end the world. She's sad 'cause her not boyfriend's dead.

22:29 Because like she. Yeah. Well, she like, saw it as it was happening. Yeah, yeah, too. She has a psychic link to the gym. Oh, right, right, 'cause gym magic, Yeah. Yeah, and when she like finds him dead, she's like, oh, I I was so, I, I was so mean to him or whatever. She like lamented not And and the whole time I'm just like oh girl, get better self esteem. Yep. He was not worth it. Can we just all agree here and now that despite only being in the film for like 5 minutes, that guy was the worst part of the movie? For 5 minutes he.

23:18 He's not even a fun, fun horror movie cameo that I can point out. Yeah. Yeah, he's just some dude. He's just annoying. It's like the worst thing a character can be. I mean, I guess horror films kind of thrive on killing annoying characters, but at the same time, I feel like this movie wants us to sympathize with him. And no, no, I'm not doing the. 90s anymore. Yeah, but anyway, this is when we go to just a random pharmacy. Fucking bum and fucking prick. Fucking face off.

23:58 What? The fucking bum and fucking priss fucking prick. Fucking face off. Yeah. We get the wonderful line you're the piss complected after birth of a Chinese gang banger. Yeah, this, this the humble. By the way, George George Buck Flower, who is a homeless man in most of John Carpenter's films and a the bum in Back to Future 1 and 2. Yeah, I know him from They Live primarily. Yeah, that's what you probably know him from. He's got a big, big ish part and they live, but he's a village of the Day after. He's a star man. He's an escape from New York. He's from the Fog again.

24:41 More horror movie people. Yeah, but he seems so genuine. I really believed he was homeless. You know, he's just really good at it. He's done it enough that he's getting good at it. Like, this is a homeless man. This is a man who's been homeless for most of his acting career. So you know. And pharmacist he's. Also a Phantasm cameo. Yeah, yeah, that's Reggie Bannister from Phantasm. Yeah, there we go. And then I think we've hit most of the ones except for, well, fucking candy. Man's going to be showing up later as well. Jason Voorhees. But for a while, here we are. I will stop pointing out cameos.

25:25 Oh yeah, only Candy Man and Jason Voorhees. No biggie. Yeah, one of the two greatest actors to ever live, Tony fucking Todd. There was no biggie deceased. Tony Todd, yes. We'll get to Tony Todd later. Anyway, Homeless guy says a bunch of crazy stuff, as Russell was pointing out before I had to nerdily point out that he this guy was in other movies. So let's get back into the plane. Well, the friendly neighborhood wisherman shows up and tells the bum to give his wish some thought, which is an offer we won't see again. Yeah, right.

26:11 Yeah, no. They're like, yeah, he they never really expound on that. Like he just, but the homeless man does and wishes the doctor had cancer, the pharmacist had cancer, died from it. And well, he does. Yeah, I I never want cancer. I already didn't. But now I want it even less 'cause that was gruesome. Yeah, that was. Most cancer probably doesn't work like that, but. Yeah, yeah.

26:52 You know I. For the audience at home, it makes him explode. Yeah, it does make him explode. And now it's my turn to point out a cameo. Apparently in the pharmacy. While he's exploding you can see famous FX man Tom Savini who did most of the Friday the 13th films in the ton of shit. Oh, OK Oh, it like the blurry shot when he's about to explode. OK, yeah, maybe that's Tom Savini. Right. OK, I'm sort of going. Through the PDA says citation needed so maybe, but I'm willing to believe it considering just how many fucking Kenyas are in this film. I mean IMDb says he was there so.

27:33 OK, I'm willing to trust IMDb more than Wikipedia. Yes anyway is this where he said the the GD says go tell the city something feeds? I forgot the exact that like he says it, he's odd wishes. Yeah, it's. A pretty cool line. Yeah, that that was when that line happened because that was right after the the bum got freaked out and ran away. Yeah, one of the few people to survive their wish. Yeah, for now. Yeah, he shows up later. Yeah. I also don't know why the the wish master feels the need to say tell people that I'm here. It's like he that's not necessary. He just shows up and tricks people doing wishes. They don't need to know about him for that to happen. He'd probably have better luck if he was like, tell people that wishes are great and they should come see me and I'm. I But considering what happened when the homeless man made his wish, I don't think that's a message the homeless man is probably going to repeat no matter what he says. Yeah, I mean, the homeless man didn't. I mean, of the wishes that are granted, the homeless man gets away alive and he sort of gets his wish. Yeah, he just has to see a man explode into cancer. Yeah.

29:01 Look the least raw deal in the movie. Yeah, this is guy who? Really saying something. Outside of maybe the last wish which she like beats the gin at the end but besides that it is all bad wishes. So what happens after that? It's. Around this part where we learn our protagonist Alexandra, we learn her back story. Oh right, she talks to like her sister. Yeah, yeah. And we see her apartment, which bitch that is a house. I don't apartment. That is the nicest looking apartment I've seen in my entire life.

29:44 Funny how we never get an exterior shot of it anyway. Yeah. Funny how that works. Yeah, but yeah, we learned her back story. Her parents had died in a fire. She managed. I think she saved her sister from it was the thing and from and then she had a long term mental health recovery. Understandable. Horrible thing, right? But it's not really. Portrayed sensitively. Yeah, yeah, her sister is kind of a jerk about the whole thing, to be honest. Yeah, you saved me from fire.

30:30 Don't be crazy about it. I glossed over that whole thing. It's like something about fire. She's sad because the guy's dead. OK, Yeah. And she has, she has like a dream where she sees, Is it Josh? I refuse to remember this guy's name. He's like a zombie. Oh, no. And then she wakes up from the dream and you're like, why did we do that? That seems, I mean, whatever special effects makeup. But yeah, she's afraid of fire. And then she goes on like she becomes a detective to try to figure out like what's going on with this gem. So she goes to the shitty dock and like starts following the clues which is classic Angels dread tails situation. Yeah, I was going to say, you know, nice to see another semi intelligent horror investigator.

31:24 Yeah. Honestly, she handled this whole thing a lot better than any of us would. Yes. Minimal fires. Yeah, yes, and she didn't really cause any of them. Yeah, yeah, but she goes into. Like an oversight. A professor lady who and tries to like learn about the gin and right she she goes to Freddy Krueger first and he tells her if she's interested in learning more about this era, go to this professor lady and she does. And then we drop the second expedition, nuke expedition exposition, exposition.

32:13 I can speak. You're thinking that the time dot is quote where the guy's an adventure. A real Christmas adventure. OK, people haven't seen one battle after another's but if you have they're laughing. They're like Christmas adventurer. Just like 1 battle after another. I will take your word for it. OK, doesn't doesn't wishy get a new face around this time too? Yeah, he goes to a morgue and. It's handsy with a dead guy. And then like some student comes in and sees that and is like wishes something along the lines of I wish I weren't seeing this, which.

32:57 Oh God, yeah. Oopsie. Do you gotta be careful? You gotta be careful. Yeah, he's surprisingly casual about the hunched figure in the shadows. Yeah, I mean, to be fair, he's at a university that's just like 1/4 of the people there. Yeah, but then he sees him and like, we haven't really talked about what the JID looks like, but he's like Emperor Palpatine, like the green. Yeah, Yeah. But like, you look at the guy just like, oh, you are not a normal dude. You are a monster man. Indeed. Yeah, Oh, I, I again, 'cause I'm, I'm just going through here. The guy doesn't even, this is the, the bullshit that the, that our gin pulls. He says the guy is this something you don't wish to see? And the guy says, yes.

33:46 It's like, come on, dude. That's like that guy didn't wish for that. You're just prompting him now. And I I guess it counts like. Yeah, still counts. And then he doesn't advise anymore. Yeah, and at that point, the gin is no longer entirely a monster man. Now he. Becomes Nathaniel Wishmaster. I don't think his name is Witchmaster. Nathaniel Wishmaster. It's like Devereaux, right? Nope. Demorest. OK, OK. Yeah, who was just like, that's before Andrew Devoff had just been doing the gin's voice. Now he's also just playing the gin. Yes.

34:33 And continues to be amazing every time he's on screen. Yep. And also, we see every time he grants A wish, Alex, like, gets a vision of it. And it's like, yeah. They showed us every time and was like, all right, I think I got it after the second time. Yeah, I don't know. I understand. I'm doing it. Yeah. Again, they didn't even let us read the opening narration. They had to, like, read it out to us. So again, they're not trusting the audience on this one. My next note is that I was not not getting creep vibes for Beaumont and I couldn't really figure out how much of A creep he was. Clearly some level, but it was never really clear. I mean, he's Freddy Krueger, man. Yeah, no, that's true.

35:23 Which is funny because from what I hear, Robert Englund is just like the nicest guy. Like, he's just such a nice dude, but he's so good at playing creepy motherfuckers. Is this where he talks about his room of dead gods, which just sounds very menacing? Yeah, yeah, I think. I think when he's talking with Alex about all that, it's honestly great use of Robert Angwin, frankly, yeah. 100% like. Absolutely. Yeah. I think while Alex is getting the the exposition dump from the lady Nathaniel Wishmaster, as Russell was calling them, it's going around just fucking doing wish shit. Oh yeah, and like and also all the ladies think he's sexy, which.

36:19 Is which I mean to be our guest, yeah, he ain't bad. He he's got a good luck. He gets himself a suit and. He was. He was very nearly stopped in his tracks by a security guard. That is my favorite part of the movie. Yeah, yeah, that does come a. Little. Late but yeah, 'cause that's great. Though I would like to mentioned when he buys a suit, he prompts the clerk into wishing she was eternally beautiful in A and it the way he says it feels very, very weird. Oh, but does it?

37:03 Bother you? That objectification intensifies. Yeah, but she says that she she agrees to his thing and he turns her into a mannequin. Yeah, just want to bring that up because that's a fun way to turn somebody into a mannequin. I just wish it wasn't. This movie shows its age in places. Oh, it really does. It really does. I mean, it's classic horror stuff, but yeah, that would definitely. I wasn't around for the 90s. I was born in 99. Were the 90s just terrible to women? Always, everyday.

37:45 Yes, so bad. Any movie from the 90s where there's a girlfriend at the end of the movie or some sort of relationship established, they make a sequel and she's gone. They do not care about that woman. Yeah, it's it was a different time. It was a different time. That's a different type, and people said it was too. Everything was being too politically correct. That's the thing people tell you about the 90s. I that is not true. Wild anyway. But nowadays we fix sexism so it's all fine, we have no problems anymore, right?

38:26 But also then the jinn goes and kills some cops. Yeah, it's part of him hunting for Alex. He's trying to get her information and goes to a police station and meets the detective who had been in charge of Josh's death. And the wishmaster sees that the guy's being real preoccupied and asks about it. And he and the cop is like, oh, we got this guy here who keeps on just barely getting away with like crimes or whatever. I just wish we would have we could get him on something easy, something he did super obviously in broad daylight.

39:12 And so the Jin's like, oh, yay, so. To speak. So then he makes the the criminal go crazy and RIP a guy's jaw off. Yes, Hell yes. And also, like, shoot a bunch of people, but like, gun kills are you're fine, Yeah. Yeah, whatever. That's not what it's about. Yeah, and using that fun little distraction, the gin sneaks a look at Alex's information and leaves. He's maybe it's funny that he's like this all powerful magical creature and but can't like magically find the cow.

39:55 She's like, I guess they're going to go see the police and fuck around. Her business card now. But like, that's the thing he keeps on. Like he brings it up because he does. I think it's comes up next the scene with the security guard. Yep, where he explicitly says to the security guard. Do you have any idea how frustrating it is to have unlimited power but only be able to use it in the service of wishes? And the security guard just says what the fuck are you talking about man? The security guard? Who is Kane Hotter? One of the guys who played Jason Voorhees. I think the most prolific Jason actor, the one who's done it the most times. Yes, even if he was in most of the really bad ones. But then again, all the Friday thirteenths are kind of bad, but he's in the really bad ones.

40:48 Like I have to assume. That's part of the charm, yes. And not necessarily his fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's in Jason X, which is a good time. I mean, that movie's not good, but that that movie's a good time. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. So Freddie and Jason are here. Yeah, and they're not fighting this time. They're not fighting this time. No, they will not fight for a while. They're still trying to make that Freddie versus Jason movie when this movie is made as it is, and they can't figure out how to make it work, but it seems like. Seems like I don't think they ever did. I mean, yeah, no, Freddie versus Jason isn't great. I don't know man.

41:38 It was I. That's that's a discussion for another time. I appreciate about that movie is that it is truly just that it is. It is aims nothing more than having like Robert Englund do his own stunts and just like punch Freddie a lot. Freddie does wrestling. Nope. Maybe next year we'll talk about Freddie versus Jason. We'll see. Anyway, the security guard tell us the wish, Master, I, I wish you would leave. And he just has to. He just has to start walking away. We get the shot of him, the smile vanishes from his face and he slowly, sadly walks away saying no, no, I have to get inside.

42:26 He theoretically is getting more powerful when they make that wish though. Yeah, yeah. But it doesn't really matter if you can't actually get to where he's going. This is. This is true. And then the security guard says to the I wish to get inside, you'd have to go through me and I'd love to see you try and. Some. Wishmasters all smiles again. Which is not phrased as a wish. And he cancelled his other witch which pisses me off. Yeah, also, you would think that this would like make Kane Hunter explode or something, and it does eventually, but first it turns him into glass and then the genie walks through the glass and then the glass shatters, which is like, I don't know, man. Well, I mean he.

43:19 Did say I'd love to see you go through me effectively and it's what he did. Yeah, this is true. This is. True. Yeah, he stepped through the glass, like face through it specifically so the guy could see him going through him. I guess you're right. And then he shattered. Yeah. And at this point we he meets Alex's boss Nick. And this gets my vote for the funniest scene in this whole fucking movie. Because the genie convinces Nick that he can indeed make him infinitely wealthy and and is willing to sell Alex out for $1 million and the genie is like done.

44:16 And we smash cut to this guy's mom filling out a life insurance policy for $1,000,000, then getting on an airplane and the airplane exploding and the scene just ends. Like monkey ball stuff. The one thing about this which makes me again, it's fine. How does this guy know that he just got a billion dollars? Because he let's, he gives the genie what he wants and then the genie walks away and the guy sitting there, it's like, OK, genie didn't hand him $1,000,000. Yes, it is through the nonsense of like, oh, you're going to get a life insurance policy, blah, blah, blah. But like as of that moment, the guy has not combed $1,000,000. This guy could just be lying to him. Yeah, I.

45:05 Think I shouldn't say that it's stupid. It's more fun to have the mom blow up in a plane with the life insurance because that's classic bandwidth shit. But. And I think we just have to assume that his mom had the most proactive lawyer in existence. Yeah, guy immediately gets an e-mail. Like, it could also just be that he trusted the gin because the gin turned an object into gold in front of him. So. This is true. We also don't like see him find out that his mom died or anything. Yeah, it just. Yeah, that's the thing. The plane explodes and the scene ends, moving right along. We don't. Even know if he's coaching. Basketball.

45:46 Yeah, I was about to say I appreciate that this movie doesn't waste time with pointless seats. Oh, wait, she's at basketball again. She's got a coach, her girls basketball team and the the the gin is like sitting there looking all medicine on the bleachers. He uses the opportunity to find out the the professor that Alex is seeing about this and in the next scene she sees the professor again. But we learned that it's the gin in disguise, and he has been, and he killed the professor off screen, which is very lame and yeah, shouldn't she have seen it because of the psychic link?

46:29 It's stupid, doesn't matter. She doesn't understand the psychic link though, is the thing. She doesn't. I, I what I do kind of appreciate that. That scene is the professor keeps asking her if she wants stuff and she's like, no, I'm fine. I don't need anything. He's like, Are you sure I can get you some water? No, I'm OK. Though. I wish her something. At one point she says please continue, which I feel should have tripped it by the Jin's loosey goosey rules. Yeah, yeah. I also wanted to point out the professor's name. There was Wendy Durluth. That's another Lovecraft reference. Oh, that is yeah. You're right, it is. I didn't catch that, Yeah.

47:09 I mean a sort of a Lovecraft reference like, you know, Jason, I mean, he published the books and wrote a bunch of the the shitty sequels. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Exactly, we wouldn't have Lovecraft without him. So anyway, this is where she finally like starts doing some wishes. Oh, oh, I've got notes about the interaction with the professor there. I, I was doing this, you know, simultaneously with watching the movie. So what the course of events there? That sounds stupid. Let's get liquored and look at my furniture. This gin stuff is bullshit.

47:49 Also. They were definitely real, but magic is gone now. Here's a quote I bet is from August Sterlitz. Also, would you kindly hey wait, what the fuck? You would dare match wits with an old dude who spent a lot of time around nothing when he wasn't being an asshole. Yeah, we do. You say we don't see her die. We do get a shot of her body with the face ripped off. That is true. It's a little grizzly, though. It's not like it's moving around or anything, so it's not as impressive an effect. But then we see then he's like, yeah, I'm a genie, what up?

48:32 Yeah. Fucking wish for something, man Fuck fucking wish. One of the wishes he offers her is a trip to the moon, and you know that's a bad choice because you're going to Monkey Monkey Spa yourself out of the other two wishes. Yeah. But The thing is, like, explicitly he needs her alive to make all three. And which is why he doesn't just, like, at any point kill her during the big climax. He's like, I don't have to kill you, I just have to make you wish for death. And which is, that's a branded terrifying line. Yeah. Really good, but he also gives her one freebie.

49:13 That's so stupid. I give you a freebie wish dude. You need 3 to take over the world. Now you need 4. You've made your job so much harder. So for her freebie, she tells him to blow his own brains out and he does and it just doesn't work. And he tells her if it's any consolation, that hurt like hell. Which is why so good Team Four Stars stole it wholesale. Oh God, you're right. Yeah, I do appreciate the quick little shot of him shooting his brains out like with a gun that he gets. Yeah. I mean he's magic, getting a gun is easy.

49:54 But yeah, he just materializes a gun, and though it is extremely funny to see this green Palpatine motherfucker holding a normal ass revolver, Yeah. And then then she wishes to. How does she end up a demon? She ends up in like genie hell for a while. What does she wish for? She wishes to know what the gin is, which is stupid and exposition she didn't need, and also the gin is not the hollowness at the heart of all my hopes. So he lied. I'm starting to think this genie is full of shit guys. Just a little bit. I don't know, man. I think I could have ended the world if I was the genie. I think I could figure it out.

50:39 Like The thing is, it would be so easy to actually just end the world as the jinn by playing good cop. Like just be like oh I want $1,000,000 done money in your bank account. Oh I want to never age done. You're young forever. I want, I want to meet the love of my life. Done. Meet the love of your life. Anyway, now I'm going to destroy the planet. Thank you for your service. Goodbye. I want. My left arm to spin around clockwise forever. It's part of a joke. It's a hilarious one. I'm not going to do the whole thing here. OK, I'll take. I'll take your word.

51:19 So that's 2 wishes right? So she wishes to know what's going on. She gets sent to like a weird GD hell where she sees everybody being tortured and that she wishes to get out. Is that right? Yeah, she wishes to be back in her apartment right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which like establishing my apartment right now. Good, precise, very difficult to misinterpret. Well done. Least wasted wish. Yeah. Oh, and then she finds out that her sister Janet or Shannon, which I feel they use interchangeably, has gone to Beaumont's party. Me too.

52:00 And it's yeah, it's the boss's party, right? Right. Yeah. It's like, no, is there the party? Yeah, Yeah, it's the boss's party, right? Because the boss is going to wish for a fair, is going to make an incredibly awful wish. I. Don't think that her boss and Freddy Krueger, like she doesn't work for Freddy Krueger. They're just like their two businesses are associated, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, once in dealer or collector and the other ones, the auctioneers. Yeah, and earlier, this isn't really that important, but for keeping the plot tidy earlier, when he gets more of his power, he collects the souls of everybody who had made a wish with him so far. So even people like the homeless man and the mannequin lady, people who didn't die when they made a wish, like that detective suddenly just drop dead because he steals their souls. Yeah, now they're in and they're in genie hell, which she's running around and it's like, I've been an example. It's Genie Hell.

53:00 Yeah. Is it inside the gem? Is that what it is? That does seem to be what kind of. Yeah, that's the, that's the implication. OK. Which is raises a lot more questions That's. Why it's red and made of tissue paper. Yeah, that's, yeah. Well that's what you get when you try to make a Geo through like blacksmithing process. Are you going to question Zoroastra himself? Yes. Damn it. Yeah. Anyway, so then then she runs to the party to get her sister 'cause she needs to protect her sister from the wishmaster or evil genie.

53:47 And she drives there like an absolute menace. There's nobody chasing her, but she's all over the road. Well, Terry, he actually was chasing her. The gin does punch out her windshield at one point, but that wasn't really chasing. Yeah. Right, right. That's why you don't. Probably just tell them. Pick up wish hikers, yeah? And then they go to the party and the bouncer. The bouncer is Tony Todd, Candy Man and many other things, yeah. Playing a character named Johnny Valentine, which is the. Only good dude in the movie. What was that?

54:30 He's the only good dude in the movie. Yeah, it's true. Yeah, it's true. Like, he's very like, nobody gets into the party unless your name's on the list. But the moment Alex tells him hey this guy is chasing me, he wants to kill me, he instantly lets her through and stops the the gin then and there. Yeah, yeah. Well, but then the gin's like, your job sucks, right? Don't you wish you had a better job? Don't you want to escape? And you can just imagine the little like doing him doing a little eyebrow wiggle, you know, just like.

55:11 He wants to escape, so obviously the Jin immediately traps him, which traps that's that's playing playing pretty loose. But I I all love. It's giving him an opportunity to escape. Yeah, it puts him in a water tank in a straight jacket, like classic magician skate trick. So I guess I'll give it to you, Jin, but I don't like it. Also, Alex totally set that guy up to die. She had to have known there was nothing he could have done. Or. Should have said whatever you do, don't say you want anything to this guy. It's complicated. That would be a good.

55:52 Idea I guess in. My head cannon? What? Could she have said in that situation to prepare him for this? In my head cannon, Johnny fucking made it out of there, you know? What? That's fair. Yeah, so that she's walking around the very crowded party. We weirdly have a scene where she goes up to the wrong blonde and tries to get her attention and then finds her sister, who's a different blonde. It's like, why didn't we need that? I don't. I don't know why we needed that. I don't know why I made that in my notes, but I did write that down. It's like this seems pointless. You. Know, the more we talk about it, the messier this film gets. Oh, this my movie. Extremely messy, but a good time.

56:36 Yeah. But yeah, Freddy Krueger is talking to the genie and the genie's like he's like, yeah, man, this is a good party, but I wish I had like a really good party. And then the G's like yeah. He said he wishes. Once where I had people skeletons pop out of their bodies. Do you want that? That's not exactly what happens. Yeah, he said he wished to have the kind of party that would be talked about for centuries, which means if this is not talked about in the sequel, the wish is invalid. And, well, all of the races are invalid. All of the yeah, yeah, cause. Spoils. Of that, yeah. But he had to know that the only kind of party that is talked about for centuries is like the Donner kind, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah that.

57:26 Would have been interesting to take it real fast. Well, yeah, so like a lady turns into glass and then explodes, that like the gargoyles come alive, that there's just stuff through people's faces with a bunch of crazy make up, the piano sometimes playing itself. So scary. Sometimes you can sort of figure out what the wish was, but other times it's like OK I guess just saying words is a wish now. Yep. I mean it's a memorable party. They don't even say anything. He just says I want to have a memorable party, which is just like, fuck you, I get to do whatever I want now. Yeah, domain expansion, this world. Pianola the ping from the start of the movie. Yeah.

58:13 Yeah. It's. I want to say that I heard that the the piano wire guy, the guy who got like his head cut off by piano wires, he was a cameo. I think he was the director. Oh, OK, I didn't catch that one. But that very well could be true. I did get all of them, clearly. So yeah. And then she's trying to find her sister in all of the horrible mess. I think Freddy Krueger dies here at some point. Yeah, he like coughs out his own stomach and it turns into a snake that tries to kill her.

58:56 Which sounds like that, yeah. Which, I mean, if you're gonna kill Robert Englund, yes, go all out. Yeah, man. But yeah, everybody's running around. Everything's crazy. We stop having a lot of cool special effects. It's mostly just people running around, Yeah. And that just like just fake blood. Yeah, a lot of fake blood. Classic fake blood stuff. It's like, come on, Fucking wish for something. Come. On I'll say 11 effect from the party that I did like. I thought the stone statues that all came to life were very, very good costuming and makeup. Yeah, it's also worth mentioning at this point that the Jinn is out of his Nathaniel Wishmaster costume.

59:41 Yeah, he's. He's walking really slow. Not to protect the foam rubber of the costume, of course. It's to be menacing. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Of course we're we are getting to see him in his full glory, walking around for a lot of the time he was wearing his Palpatine black robe. So, yeah. And is this is where he's like, And I got your sister too. Fuck. You wish to save them. Because he reveals that he turned her sister into a painting and then set it on fire. And I will say, you know, specifically doing something to trip someone's trauma is a pretty fucking evil villain move. So I'll give him that one, yeah.

1:00:22 Yeah, this is also where they do the line. What are you going to do? I don't need you dead. I'm going to make you. Wish to death or Yeah. I've got a note that Han Solo shows up again. Yeah. Yeah, it's good times. Yeah. And in with I. Mean. It's bad times. It's all a very bad time. Yeah, it's Alex is having a horrible fucking day. And at this point we learned that this whole movie took place over the course of two days, aside from that bit at the beginning because using the advice that she gave one of her girls for scoring a shot in basketball, she calms down and it's so I they didn't need the basketball subplot for that, but OK.

1:01:12 But then. There wouldn't have been any sort of reference for when she started thinking about stillness. Yeah. I you guys are all forgetting we're not mentioning the part where the gin rubs his nipples because he's so excited about all the wish stuff that's going on. He doesn't really have, but he's. Dancing. Yeah, I guess it's kind of a dance, but it sure looks like he's just really feeling himself. Bro's just having a great time, clearly. Also like like a painting of Jack the Ripper that is inexplicably here, that Jack the Ripper comes out of it. Oh yeah.

1:01:53 I don't know why you have a painting of Jack the Ripper, but. Also one of the one of the guard like security guards, police officers that comes in when all the chaos is happening is played by Dennis Hayden who is most notable for being the American terrorist in the first Die Hard movie. Oh, OK, Anyway, so she's, she's trying to be calm. She's remember you've got to be calm when you're playing basketball and thank God we set up basketball earlier because how else would she know she needs to be calm? So that was very good that they included that. And then then what does she figure out what she's calm? Does she get it right away?

1:02:42 Like does she go through a thing where she explains? I don't quite remember how it goes. She just we see her flashing back to reading the newspaper about the accident and she remembers the name of the guy who caused the crane accident at the beginning of the movie and she wishes that he had not been drinking at work 2 days ago. And the gin is like what? And then the entire thing falls apart because the accident only happened because he was drinking, and we effectively removed the entire movie from the space-time continuum. Yay Donnie Dirko. Yeah. I've never seen Donnie Darko.

1:03:22 I've heard it's good. I should do that. Oh, it was a great. Yeah, but get sucked back into the gem and then thrown back in time and everything resets. It's a stupid loophole. That was the third wish. Yeah, so like do with the the genies should have? Well, they really should have had it the whole time, but she he had given her a free wish. Earlier, right the freebie. Why are you saying? He screwed himself with that in the second movie. It's a trap wish which makes so much more sense that. Makes so much more sense.

1:04:04 I don't know what a trap wish is to be fair, but. This wish is free. No, it's not. It counts. It counts it as a wish. I guess he learned his lesson from this one. He's like, OK, no more of those. Ted Rainey not crushed by a box. Yep, and unfortunately that means Josh is still alive and Alex and Josh end up like she ends up reciprocating his advances and you know the implications that they hook up. And then we zoom in on the statue and we see the gin in his fire. Opal still plotting.

1:04:47 Well, you see, he's he's happy because now that gin sorry, now that Josh is actually going to escape the friend zone, he's monkey pot US one last time. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, at. Least at least she's dating that jerk because of all the trauma I gave her. Wow, he really is a terrifying villain, my God. But yeah, it's, and that is Wishmaster. I don't know, from listening to us talk, I don't know if you would know if we like this movie or not.

1:05:32 I 'cause it's got a lot of problems. Yeah, like something I pride myself on is I like to be able to meet movies, games, books, etcetera. I like to be able to meet them where they are. And this movie, what it's trying to do, like the stuff with the gin and having some like creative cool special effects and some wild ass like wish kerfucker E, That shit's all so fun. Yeah, I think, I think overall, I don't think I was disguising it pretty well. I've been pretty excited about this movie.

1:06:12 I think this movie does succeeds at what it's trying to do pretty Dang well. I think it's got a lot of really good special effects. I kind of wish there were a couple more special effect sequences, but that's just me being greedy. Fucking. I just, I guess I'm not impressed by any. The skeleton crawling out of that guy's body in like the first couple minutes of the film. It never gets that good again for me. But there's still some good stuff here, you know? It was. Performances from What's her name? But anyway, what are you saying? Yeah. It was a it was a fun movie, I think is the best way that I can put it.

1:06:56 It's one of the few movies like I'm not a big fan of remakes myself. It's one that I'd actually kind of like to see them try and remake because like, as as you were saying, Daniel, the IT it could have done. It could have been better served by having more comprehensive and better effects. I think there was a lot to be. Fair. They look good for 97. Oh yeah. But yeah, or it's time it it was pretty good. But yeah, like it if, if it were to get the treatment today of like a remake with today's technology, I think it could go a lot better.

1:07:46 And then we also wouldn't have to deal with fucking Josh's character as he currently is, because yeah, Josh is a douchebag. Josh sucks. Yeah, everyone should be in the skin he stole. Yeah. If we did a remake, I don't know, Like, I worry that they would just rely on CGI too much and it wouldn't look quite as good, but it could be better. But yeah. To be fair, there have been, like, there's been a big resurgence in practical effects for modern horror lately, yeah. This is true. I yeah, like, I think remakes should be, should are, are better used on films that had potential but was missed, you know, and this film absolutely qualifies for that because it's a fun movie. I I don't know if I can call it a good one. I think it is a movie that everybody should watch, and if you're only half paying attention, that's OK. Oh.

1:08:46 Yes. Yeah, I I don't know if we were to do a remake. I don't know if Diva, I mean, he's still alive, but I don't know if he could do it anymore. He's. Getting a little cold? Probably. I think he's like 70 at this point. He could probably still do the voice. Yeah, he's, he's 70. Oh, apparently he has his own craft beer called the Gins Hella Brew. Sorry while. Looking at what he's up to these days. All right. Yeah, it probably was not necessary to include that, but you got it anyway.

1:09:34 Yeah, but I will say this, I'm glad I watched this movie. I had a pretty good time. Saying it. The second. 1. Oh yeah, go ahead. The second one it gets a little goofier, so I watch it as a comedy movie. What about the first? One as the comedy movie. Softcore porn? Well. Stop in it after the second one, right? They get a different guy to be the witchmaster after the second one, correct? Yeah, yeah. OK, then what's even the point anymore? Yeah, well, the softcore porn. Yeah, I mean that that is the way of horror movie sequels or they go to space or the hood. But this was.

1:10:19 Sometimes all of the above. Yeah, fair. But yeah, I will say I enjoyed this movie. I will also say I watched it in like 3 different settings and it's not a particularly long movie. I just got to play with like yeah, I'm good. And that's just what. That's enough Wishmaster for today. Yeah. So that's probably not the greatest endorsement to what endorsement words. But you know, if you're looking for something fun to do this Halloween season, check it out. It's not Tubi. You could do a lot worse than Wishmaster. You do a lot better, to be fair, but you know you do a lot worse. Jesus, we cannot give this film a straight compliment. I give it a 5 out of five.

1:11:10 It's an asterisk. In terms of movies with genies, this is better than the live action Aladdin movie. And scarier. Yes, I wouldn't call this movie scary. No, I. Call it scarier than Aladdin. Yeah, got it. Well, I mean, you know, the whole The Cave of Wonders opening. That was pretty spooky in the animated one, yeah. But I I have seen the live action 1 and I wish I hadn't. Anyway, that's our Halloween special everybody. Happy Halloween.

1:11:51 Anything we want to close with? Happy Halloween. It's the only holiday that matters. Fuck the other holidays. I like Christmas. Thanks for listening. Daniel's gentiles was Daniel Fernandez, Nathan Friedman, Damien Morphett and Russell McCracken. Our main theme is by Claire LW and our album art is by Trinity the Tea Time Witch. The next leg of Eternal Lies will be coming at you shortly and the wrap up with the last leg will be coming to even shortly. Follow us on website and socials and whatever. We have a Patreon. Thanks for listening and until next time.